“You can light one candle in the darkness…”

Were there moments of miscommunication or cultural difference, and how did you navigate those? 

For our first family, we excitedly took them to the beach for a day out.  But we hadn’t anticipated that the family didn’t like getting their feet sandy. When we took the second family, we checked if they liked getting sandy and that wasn’t the problem. When they thought of the beach, they imagined swimming in warm water and basking in the sun. We had to send them back inside to get their jackets and warm clothes because it was October! 

When we encountered little misunderstandings we first had a laugh and then just tried to learn and adapt. We asked questions, observed, and followed their lead on cultural matters. Over time, we learned what made them comfortable and what didn’t. 

What have you learned from the family? 

I’ve learned so much about resilience. It’s incredible how they have had the courage and strength to keep going. They’ve taught me not to take things for granted and the importance of perspective. They’re able to find joy in little things and have patience with themselves. 

I think about the loneliness that they feel missing the camaraderie of friends and family who are left behind. I know they have had to ask, “How do I fit in here? How do I make friends?” I admired the steps they’ve taken to stay on this legal route through the incredibly difficult process, to be hopeful, and to keep taking a step forward each day. 

How do you feel your community benefited from Community Sponsorship? 

There’s real social value. We don’t have a diverse range of cultures where we live, but this gave us the opportunity to talk about welcoming refugees and why we’re doing it. It has given us a window into a life we didn’t know about before, and share these experiences with others in the community. That personal connection helps people see that refugees want the same things we all want—safety and happiness. We have so much in common. They’re just such kind and grateful people, and their appreciation has been incredible. 

The group has also become close. We’ve worked really well as a team and taken care of each other, so that different people contribute different amounts based on circumstances and what talents they have. It has taken more time and energy than I thought it would take, but it has been very satisfying to be part of the programme.  

What surprised you most about the experience of welcoming a refugee family? 

I was surprised by how much enjoyment I got out of it. Rather than feeling like I was helping people, I found it incredibly enjoyable to grow our friendships and enjoy them as individuals and people. Their positivity and strength surprised me and they’ve been very inspirational. The journey was a hard one, so it’s been wonderful to be able to help them along the way. 

How do you respond when you hear negative rhetoric about refugees or immigration? 

I try to say things like, “Have you met a refugee family? Because I have.” I also try to validate how people feel and then bring it back to my experience. I put in comments about how hard they work and how they are role models. I always bring it back to personal experience. I can’t speak for everyone, but I can speak for the families I know. They wouldn’t be here if they had another choice. They have worked so hard to get here. It hasn’t been an easy journey. 

How are the families coping with the political climate? Have they experienced any challenges? 

Both families have noticed a tone change with negative rhetoric. We don’t know if they get negative comments directly. 

One of the boys’ high schools changed to unisex toilets, and he said he feels like he cannot use them because he doesn’t want to make anyone uncomfortable. He comes home to use the toilet. But the families are so nice-natured they don’t dwell on these challenges. 

They were aware that people could say bad things about them as this happened to them before in Egypt too. They’ve been refugees most of their lives, so they just get on with it. The nice people outweigh the bad. I think Community Sponsorship has made them think this way, that everyone is not against them. They always go back to the fundraising and how random people gave money for them to be there. 

What would you say to someone considering Community Sponsorship? 

This is the most worthwhile thing I’ve been involved with. It may be only one or two families but this has been life changing for these families. This is something you can do in response to the overwhelming problem of safe and legal routes into the UK. You can light one candle in the darkness. There’s also the side benefit of meeting people in the community who want the world to be a better place. We called it our local response to a worldwide problem. 

It is HARD, but it is worth it. The robust application process made us robust as a group. Looking back, I don’t regret the time it took to apply because we already had grown together as a group. We had setbacks such as getting our bank account set up and finding the house. These challenges, however, helped us to learn about each other and how we would deal with difficulties. One thing we learned, was to remember to also consider the wellbeing of the group. We made sure that group members didn’t give more time and energy than they can afford to because it could be exhausting. 

What do you wish more people understood about refugee resettlement? 

That it is not easy for a refugee to come here. They have worked so hard to be here. They have put up with so much and ended up making do with jobs that aren’t the best but will hire them. I wish people understood the sacrifices they have made. 

In what ways has Community Sponsorship affected your own life or perspective? 

It’s made me realize how big the crisis and problem really is, and how we need to have honest discussions with people. When there are this many people suffering, this is something we need to keep working on and addressing. 

It has been such a positive experience. It has really enhanced my life and brought me a lot of joy.